Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Unfriended

Image: ThomasGoods www.wesrch.com
It's been too long since I've blogged. I've been working on a lengthy project, and it has taken up a lot of my brain capacity. Lately, I've been feeling the urge to jump back into sharing my thoughts here. That being said:

Social media has become such a thing of importance in our culture. It's silly how much we base our everyday lives on it. We figure out how to look using Pinterest, get our "news" from Facebook, create a falsified image of ourselves on Instagram and Twitter, and report every moment of our lives via Snapchat. We compete with everyone on the internet, trying to prove with photos and clever quips that our life is better than theirs. These things have become the focal point of our lives. Because of that, when we're rejected via social media, or "unfriended", it hurts. It actually, legitimately hurts.

It's stupid, really. It's not like all of these people are our close friends. But the real problem comes when someone that is supposed to be there for you unfriends you. We feel rejection, bitterness, angst. We spend hours trying to analyze WHY. Why don't they like me anymore? Did I say something to upset them? Did someone else tell them something bad about me? Do they hate me? What happened? We torture ourselves trying to figure out something that really shouldn't matter, anyway. When did our worth become dependent on how many fake friends we've acquired online? Why do we base so much of our self-worth on friendships in the first place?

There was a time that I looked at my life and with selfish pride said, "Wow, I have a lot of friends, I must be pretty awesome." And that, my friend, was me begging to be taught a lesson. And don't you worry, life did indeed teach me a thing or two. Through being unfollowed and unfriended for one reason or another, I've started to learn...it doesn't matter. My life isn't governed by how many people like me. What's important is the lasting relationships that I do have. What I need to do is pour into the people who genuinely care, to show them how much they mean, how valued they are. And I really, REALLY need to stop Facebook stalking the people that have left me behind. It's a bit out of hand. It's time to let go.

We need to remind ourselves constantly that we are precious, and that our value is not based on social media. Take a moment of your day and take pride in an accomplishment. No matter how small you may think it is. The tiniest pebble still has a ripple effect. The more we learn to appreciate ourselves, the less likely we are to get lost trying to keep up with the Joneses (or Kardashians, whichever is more relevant to your life).

Always,

Jackelyn Stange

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